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Akito Blaze
New Member
4 Posts
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Post by Akito Blaze on Mar 3, 2018 21:58:14 GMT -6
AKITO BLAZE NAME — Akito Blaze AGE — 23 years GENDER — Male SEXUALITY — Heterosexual TRAINER CLASSES — Tactition Trainer, Breeder, Researcher AFFILIATION — Former Team Rocket OCCUPATION — Magician/Authur/ he goes for both badges and ribbons but focuses more on being a coordinator APPEARANCE HEIGHT — 6’7” WEIGHT — 200 LBS HAIR COLOR — Rusty red/redish brown EYE COLOR — Deep Crimson SKIN COLOR — Pale ABNORMALITIES — Bad scars from burns on right hand. PERSONALITY Charismatic/Captivating - Very handsome man that is very, charismatic. Many people have told him that he is very handsome. He has gotten a lot of stuff based on his appearance. However, he does not play with peoples hearts. Not on purpose anyways. He tends to also hold peoples attention hans why he chose a career where that is the goal. Considerate/Compassionate - He tries his best to think of others first. He tries his best not to be a bother or trouble for anyone. He tries his very hardest to avoid that if at all possible. He also is very considerate of other peoples feelings or views. However, that was not always the case. He used to not care but since then he has tried to change that about himself. Assertive/Arrogantt - He is very assertive when it comes to himself. Often times too Assertive which is what got him into trouble when he was little and with Team Crux. His arrogance was also a problem then and as he grew up. He tends to have a very large exaggerated sense of what he can do. Which makes him not know his place or how to respect his superiors. Deceitful/Difficult - Well he is difficult in many ways. His arrogance makes him very difficult to deal with but he also is very tricky to understand. He can be difficult if he's made angry or being stubborn. He also can be deceitful it's an old habit he’s trying to break. Its what attracted people to him that wanted him for evil deeds. However, even though he's trying hard he is far from changing that part of him. BACKGROUND Akito is the oldest of 3 siblings. He was also the favorite son. His parents poured most of there time into him and his little sister who was only 2 years younger than him. They were pressured to be the perfect children. They lived in the Kanto region. However, his parents started having trouble with him around elementary, when he gained his arrogance and assertiveness traits. His parents then started believing he was a lost cause. Because to them his arrogance and assertiveness made him anything but the perfect child. So they started to believe him to be a lost cause. Because to them he was bringing shame to his family name. He would constantly get in trouble at school for disrespecting teachers and school staff. However, no one could figure out what his motives were in school. He didn't show much interest to other teachers and students. Eventually, his arrogance and assertiveness started affecting his school life so much so that he dropped out and left home at age 14. No one herd from him not even his family until he was arrested for hustling people for their belongings. Eventually he joined Team Rocket when he was 16 years old. One day he learned how bad the group he was in really was and quit by getting some of the members and himself locked up. For smuggling stollen pokemon. Since then he has moved to a new region, written many books fantasy and romance books under the name of Joker. He has become a well-known author as well as a magician. It has now been 3 years since he was let out of being locked up. 2 since his first books came out. 1 year since he started entertaining kids as a magician. It was on his way to this new region that he met a woman whos pokemon egg was stolen from her by a lowly thug. He managed to get the egg back which was soon going to hatch. This person as a gift gave him the egg. A few days later it hatched into a Litleo that he named zero. He was assigned pokemon when he was with Team Rocket. So zero was his first of his own. He plans to go for badges and ribbons. STARTER NAME — Zero LEVEL — 5 SPECIES — Litleo TYPE — Fire/Normal EGG GROUP — Field ABILITY — Unnerve HELD ITEM — none GENDER — Male HEIGHT — 2’0” WEIGHT — 25.8 LBS MOVE LIST — Tackle, Leer, Ember, Yawn PERSONALITY — Fiery - He is very passionate about whatever he does with his trainer. He has always let this passion guide him. Although it has caused him trouble at times. Not only does be have a firey passion. But he also can be really angry easily. Which has caused him to bite and burn Akito at times. He has a really tough time controling his rage. And yet this only makes the pair stronger together. This pokemon has a fiery passion for victory and in doing whatever causes himself joy. He does have a bad temper that he tends to take out on his fellow pokemon. He's very possessive of his food or objects so that's how his trainer's right hand is so messed up. However, when he does it he becomes sorry this is why his trainer is patient with him and doesn't get mad at him unless he bites a fellow pokemon or stranger. PLAYED BY Phantom
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CAT
Junior Moderator
148 Posts
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I'm so much cooler online.
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Post by CAT on Mar 5, 2018 9:52:28 GMT -6
Akito BlazeHello again, Phantom. There are a few things to be addressed before your app can be accepted. Again, the profile image needs to be 100x100 exactly. If you need help resizing, many of our members would be willing to help. It should be known that we discourage making multiple characters so close to each other. It would be wise to focus on one character and save the other for later. However, if you so choose to work with both characters right off the bat, I'll move on to the actual app: Under affiliation, please either put "trainer" or "team crux" even if he is a former member. You can easily explain this in his history. Also, please narrow down his occupation. While it is possible to have many jobs, we need to know if he is specifically a trainer or a coordinator for group purposes. In your history, why did Akito's parents struggle with him in elementary school? How is he suddenly a lost cause when his parents doted on him so much before? If he was such a troublemaker, why did other students look up to him? Akito joined Team Crux at the age of 16, which is fine. However, Team Crux is a very evil organization that only takes people that are extremely useful. What qualities did Akito have that made Team Crux seek him out? Simply hustling people isn't good enough. How old was Akito when he realized his mistake? Team Crux would have made their intentions very obvious from the start, so what suddenly causes his change of heart? How did he get himself locked up? Also, keep in mind that Team Crux does not take defection lightly and would be after him, so unless he goes by a pen name, it would not be wise of him to be a "well-known" anything. You make no mention of how Akito met Zero. Please include this information in your history. Also, please include what Akito and Zero are currently doing. There's no mention Akito doing anything as a trainer or a coordinator, so please include this information if you intend to have it as your occupation. Your starter's personality is too short. It should be at least 100 words. Once you have made these edits, please post in the mod request thread and it will be reviewed again.
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IMUIT
Administrator
544 Posts
8 Likes
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Posts: 544
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Post by IMUIT on Mar 7, 2018 18:46:57 GMT -6
Being 6’7” and 125 lbs is not a logical height and weight combination. At the very least, he’d be around 190 lbs, and that is if he is relatively skinny.
Also, you really didn’t address anything in Akito’s history. Most parents don’t give up on their children when they are really young just because the children are little brats. I also don’t understand why his fellow students looked up to him if he was extremely arrogant and disrespectful. Considering that he left Team Rocket, how does he successfully evade him, especially considering that he somehow became somewhat famous as an author? Really read through what Cat asked and adjust your background accordingly.
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PEONY
Junior Moderator
184 Posts
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m l e m
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Post by PEONY on Mar 12, 2018 6:39:44 GMT -6
May I ask why Akito suddenly gained his "arrogant and assertive" traits during elementary school? What exactly made his assertive and arrogant? Was it because his peers thought of him as a leader, or did they ridicule him and so he tried to stand up for himself? Why was he arrogant -- did he excel in certain subjects in school, or maybe some kind of sport or talent? Or perhaps he was popular with the kids (maybe because he had something that they didn't, I got the impression that Akito's family is rich), so that's why they flocked to him and he became arrogant and assertive. You're kind of repeating sentences in the last four sentences of the first paragraph. Why exactly did his "arrogance and assertiveness" make his family believe him to be a lost cause? Was it because he was defying authority? You did mention that in the next paragraph, but from the way you framed your background, it seemed like because his parents thought of him as a lost cause, he began to be rebellious and aloof (I pulled in the latter trait because of the statement "No one could figure out what his motives were", but honestly you could say that Akito may have just been very secretive). Is this really the order of events you want, or is it the other way around? You didn't get to answer Cat's question about why Team Rocket decided to pick him up. This group kind of runs like a business, so there has to be good reason why they'd suddenly pick up someone like Akito, who seems to be nothing more than a petty thief at the time. Perhaps they wanted to find someone disposable, but it turned out Akito was successful in his mission. That's one way to go about it. Also, I'd still like to see some expansion on how Akito found out the group was bad and then decided to do a heel-face turn. Sure, he found out that they were smuggling Pokemon, but he stole goods before, what makes this different? Do not be afraid to talk about how the character went through some development and also what specific event made him change his mind. Maybe he saw the Pokemon he helped steal tortured, or how they were crying for their old trainers. For logistic reasons, I'd like to ask how he got enough money to move to a new region, unless he did it through illegal means. If that's the case, please mention it! Also, since he dropped out of school at the age of 14, how did he become a successful writer? It's also very out of the blue since it was never mentioned that Akito had a fondness for writing. Either you expound on this or you remove it, since it seems like an embellishment right now rather than an important character trait. The magician part is more believable, especially if he used this as a means to earn some pocket change to survive. You also didn't answer Imuit's question on how Akito was able to successfully avoid Team Rocket. His status as author is indeed giving him contention there, so it might be better to either remove it or make him an aspiring writer (but please give some background on this rather than just dropping it out of the blue). The rest of it seems alright, so if you can edit and detail your background better to what I've asked, I'll approve it! Also there are many more personality traits in the world than "arrogant" and "assertive". Do consider consulting a thesaurus or a list of qualities to help you expand Akito's character
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